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This show also known as: I Didn't Wanna Give Up The Tacos!

OH NO! It's been so long since the last episode of Fast Karate for the Gentleman that Joel's gonna buy an island in the middle of Lake Victoria and live out his lonesome party palace dreams. Will it be cool?? You'll just have to listen to find out! Because don't worry, he's not on the plane to Tanzania until we get done talking about JoJos! Sorry, I guess, that I haven't used Skype in an age, and so I didn't realize that the "automatically adjust my mic settings for me" got reticked in some crappy update or something. Also sorry that our brains are burnt and I have no idea what we talk about in this thing, even though I just edited it! I remember tempura shrimp and a magical food truck that cures your poops and a crappy stand user named after an equally crappy band (karma!) and an INVISIBLE BABY and what's mor--INVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BABYINVISIBLE BA{LINE ERROR} {ATTEMPTING RECOVERY} Shizuka_too_much_makeup {RECOVERY FAILED} jojo-s413_04 {COOL BABY STACK OVERFLOW DETECTED} {FORCING SHUTDOWN} {SEE YOU IN TWO MONTHS} {I GUESS THAT'S HOW LONG IT TAKES FOR US TO DO THESE NOW??} Music Selection: I DON'T WANT YOUR LIFE AND/OR IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. This show is about: Cecil_Rhodes_ww Go Fall Off Your Own Bridge You Big-Nosed-Ass, Whelp-Ass, Punk-Ass, Racist-Ass, Imperial-Ass, Tonic-Swilling-Ass, Hey!-Finish-The-Leftovers-In-The-Fridge-Before-You-Order-More-Takeout-You-Think-Money-Grows-On-Trees??-Ass, Colonialist Piece of Shit. I hope Mark Twain do hang you I'd buy a ticket.
Direct download: FK-160819.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:56am EDT

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This show also known as: I Thought CARL was Fast, But...

Screen Shot 2016-06-22 at 10.25.08 AM Oh boy oh boy oh boy, it's time again for the semi-seasonal (give or take!) Podcast What Where We Talk About JoJos. But if you want your tasty Stand-sourced soft-boiled eggs, first you're gonna have to choke down your asparagus wrapped in dictionary pages, which in this case is 16~20 minutes of us whining about How Loot Games Suck Butts. But after that it's 100% all pure Jojos with absolutely no interruptions or digressions ever, so strap yourself in! Between the littlest fist bump of all time, Araki sitting in a tree like a Tiger Beat splash page, speculation on the veracity of Lucille Ball's Teeth, Dude, did you have sex with your puppet stand, and Tamami/Grizzled Mobster Koichi teaming up for the ultimate supernatural long-con, it's gonna be a bumpy ride!! Music Selection: Damn you, Fallout; I don't care anymore, I just want you to tell me the truth. This show is about: uZt5psa   Almost as good as him kicking back in a tree I guess (or better??)  
Direct download: FK-160622.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:52am EDT

E3 is over so that means it's time to talk videogames with Todd Ciolek, Dave Riley and Heidi Kemps! The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, Resident Evil 7, Overwatch and much more!

Category:general -- posted at: 4:47pm EDT

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This show also known as: It's A Matinee Of All The Ediths!

3cba49eb81c9feb23e0366b35b5da37e Man, you know Momodora must rock because, between our real-time chronicle of the adventures of General Ambrose Burnside, our fretting over the welfare of the planet (and/or whether or not Vikings were dicks (and/or the worrying amount of depth you can get into about how directly the people of Dune ate their own poop to survive)), and our cutting, existen[z]tial dread about the humanity of [Tien's best friend] Chiaotzu, we hardly spend any time talking about it at all!! All in all, wasn't Ravenous a good movie tho? Music Selection: (It really was) This show is about: ambrose-burnside-large BURNSIDE GOT THE DROP ON YA. Also Download The mp3 Or Whatever  
Direct download: FK-160519.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:48am EDT

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This show also known as: They Call These The "Angel's Share."

maxresdefault (1) In this slow-paced Fast Karate, we take the return from our (fairly common) month+ hiatus at a leisurely lope, only discussing JoJo's Part 4: Diamond Is Unbreakable as it suits us, and peppering the conversation with musings about flags with dragons on them, the fear of skeet shooting (and I should've known better to come at Joel when 00s rap is on the line), and, finally, the ongoing Steam Anime Sale, where you could buy Momodora why not, it's pretty good! Somewhere around there we do get an inclination of (possibly still alive) Joseph Joestar's sweaty, glistening muscles, sweep ourselves up in the legalistic furor of Bad and/or Worse Company, but mostly I'm consumed by THE MYSTERY OF THE EGG, which remains potent inside me till this very day (which is really only one day after we recorded the podcast). Anyway I guess the audio's bound to sound weird but I did the best I can, given Audition crashed halfway through and I had a minor heart attack when the project loaded with all blank files. No worries! Just slap some half-assed compression and noise reduction on it, delete a quarter of the mouse clicks and keyboard clacking, and call it a day. It's the Fast Karate Seal of Quality! Music Selection: Martika will only let her constant JoJos snubbing stand for so long; she has some amount of self-respect, however small. This show is about: bhutan-king-and-queen BHUTANESE FLAG: NAILED IT.  
Direct download: FK-160429.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:29pm EDT

***WARNING***EXPECT***MASSIVE***(JOKE)***SPOILERS***

In perhaps our most Fast Karate Episode Ever, we volley back and forth our appreciation of the DMX/Jet Li Combination Movie Oeuvre, do a poor job explaining why a really great show (One Punch Man) is really great**, dream up the greatest Pablo Picasso/Lord of the Rings AU Crossover Of All Time, question the Market Value Of Saffron (and speculate on, shall we say, "locally sourced" replacements), and round things out with an prolonged discussion on what Ninja Battles SHOULD Be Like, closing with everyone's favorite topic, The Extended, Excoriating Psychic Torment Of The Children In Detective Conan.

Direct download: FK-160313.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:50am EDT

Tharsis!

Direct download: FK-160122.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:05pm EDT

All apologies to Schrodinger, I loved what they did with your character on Breaking Bad.

KAGE-KAGEWANI CAN'T U SEE

SOMETIMES UR SHADOW CROC JUST HYPMOTIZE ME

Direct download: FK-160114.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:46pm EDT

Darkest Dungeon and questions from viewers like you!

Direct download: FK-151211.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:23am EDT

Don't mind me just trying not to get my hopes up over the glut of Valkyrie/Valkyria-based content coming my way.

Category:general -- posted at: 4:25pm EDT



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